What Do We Talk About On The First Date?

Are you stuck for words? Don’t feel alone or insecure because 75% of all first time daters have the same problem. Communicating with each other can make or break your date. Nervous? You betcha! Holy smoke, I have this big lump in my throat and can’t speak. It goes both ways. Everyone knows a friend who is so glib that he or she attracts almost anyone they meet. Sometimes you are afraid of being laughed at or just embarrassed you can’t converse well. Dead silence is a killer.

We all have our little “pickup line” and when that fails we are grasping straws on subjects to talk about. A word of wisdom on pickup lines would be that if you are not sure what to say just compliment the other person. If you are somewhat clever you might inject some humorous line. Don’t by any means make a sexual joke or describe a particular part of the body ( except a smile of course).

Whatever you do don’t talk about yourself excessively because it’s boring to your date. Your date will think you are too self-centered and perhaps conceited or just trying too hard to impress. You need to show concern and interest about your date. Listen attentively and be genuine. The quicker both of you can find that common ground about a subject you both enjoy your confidence explodes and you relax almost immediately.

Here are a few tips on making an impression and getting started:
1) Ask your future date what kind of food he or she likes. There is nothing that turns off a potential suitor than going to a restaurant which has food you don’t like. What happens if your date is a vegetarian or even allergic to some foods? Ask some questions to find a common ground such as :
2) What do you do for fun when not working.
3) What about travel? Where would you rather live in the world if you had a choice and why?
4) What entertainment do you prefer? Music Artists, Movie Stars and favorite movies, literature and favorite books, television Series etc:
5) Where did you spend your childhood? Childhood events, stories and memories can be very funny and good conversation
6) What kind of job do you have and why you enjoy about it. Do they want the job for a career or still keeping their options open for something else down the road.
7) Make your date feel like they are the only person in the restaurant or coffee shop. This is very important to show you care.
What about hobbies? Everyone has some. You might find a common thread.
9) Do either of you participate in any sports? This is a great way to enjoy each others’ company. Tennis, golf, bowling, sailing, jogging whatever.
10) Dress and impress. First impressions are huge no matter how great a talker you are.
Try some of these openers and when they click you will find the second date with the same person will come quite naturally

Try to avoid the following:
1) Don’t get too personal. Forget the dramas. Each of you have a sad tale but no one really wants to talk about it. Keep it upbeat.
2) Avoid past relationships. Don’t get into old boyfriends and girlfriends. It’s none of your business at this stage.
3) Your health issues are not important at this point. Keep them to yourself. Don’t discuss your latest operation or what went wrong. You just might scare your date to look for someone else.
4) Avoid making any assumptions about your future with your date. This makes someone very nervous and makes you seem desperate. What’s the rush? An example would be to bring up the subject of marriage.
5) Personal hygiene. Check your bad breath if you have it and any other personal stuff that makes you look grubby.
6) Avoid terrible topics such as gay marriage, abortion, political agendas, and sexual preferences as examples.
7) It is best at this stage to not discuss your financial bio. Your date might feel inadequate if you come across as a spoiled rich person or just about to join the unemployment line.

Common sense goes a long way. Put yourself in the other persons’ shoes. What will impress you and what will turn you off? Don’t panic. The other person has the same thoughts as you do and wants to put their best foot forward. Have fun, laugh and keep it lite. There is always another different date tomorrow if the first doesn’t work out. Just keep positive.